November isn’t my favorite month. But I gotta tell ya, the person I am this November is much different than the last. As I reflect on the past year, I can see how much I struggled… how I let my heart believe in people who never gave enough to me… people who made me feel unworthy. But even in my own lack of self-respect and failure to acknowledge the manipulation of others, I was comfortable. That’s where the hard part comes in. I was lost in something so bad and I’ve been there for so long that I didn’t realize how lost I truly was. Looking back a year, I thank God for taking my hand and guiding me here. It’s been a long road. No, my heart isn’t healed. It’s not perfect and it never will be. There will always be cracks and scars, but I’m stronger. I’m still learning. And that in itself is a total blessing. Let me tell you about another blessing.
Christmas mini sessions are in full swing around here and it has been total madness… and I’m absolutely loving every second of it. Yesterday, I worked with clients from many different cities, all hours away. As I thanked one of the beautiful mommies for making the drive to me, she looked at me and said, “Taylor, you don’t have to thank me. This isn’t the first time we made this drive to you and it certainly won’t be the last. You’re worth it.”
And for the first time in almost 5 years, I actually felt it. Worthy.