I’m sitting on the floor in tears as I sift through our old photos. I know for a fact that you will laugh at me for crying and say something like, “Oh jeez…”. You always do.
It’s late (or early depending on how you want to look at it) and your graduation is hours away. Graduation. Hours away… wait a second- weren’t we just playing hide-and-seek and lava monster in the basement? It seems like yesterday but that was at least 10 years ago. When I think about our memories, nothing specific stands out to me; Instead, small blips in time come to mind… singing “Sunday Morning” at the top of our lungs, making faces in the bathroom mirror while brushing our teeth, sledding down the stairs (and then getting in trouble for sledding down the stairs), getting in trouble for A LOT of things, waking up our big brother with our late night and early morning laughter, playing house in the basement, sharing popcorn late at night, running barefoot in the yard… I know people always say that time goes fast, but wow, Allie, time went fast.
Time just keeps on going and our family and friends have been asking me, “what is Allie going to do without you?”. This question always catches me off guard. I’m not at all worried about what you’re going to do without me. The real question is, what will I do without you?
See, the thing is, I know that you will be great. I know that you will make good choices, study hard, and have fun. You’ll take this change with ease and grace… well, because that’s what you do. You’ll be perfect… because that’s what you are. You are so incredibly beautiful, and I’m not sure if you even know it. You are modest. You are funny and smart and kind. You have the biggest heart of anyone I know. You are driven and stubborn. Yeah, you’ll be just fine. Just please carry a campus map with you everywhere you go. I think you’re perfect, but your sense of direction stinks. Don’t worry, we have a whole Summer ahead of us to learn the best route to school and back home.
I remember when you and I first shared a room together. The memory is a little blurry, but it’s there. From then on out, we were inseparable. We’ve already gone through so many changes together… We switched schools and watched our big brother and sister go off to college… and some of these changes can only be described as challenges. We had to say goodbye to our biggest sister… but through it all, we grew together. We learned. We accepted. We let go… and as we stumbled, we had each other. That will never change. All of these new changes are scary, especially for me, but this is just a new page in our book. It’s just hard to believe it’s really here. You graduating from high school just seems like one of our games of playing pretend.
My hopes for you, Allie, are endless. I know you don’t have it all figured out quite yet, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that because you will figure it out, and you know I’ve got your back if you need anything at all. It’s an unspoken rule between sisters. God has blessed me and ten times more when he gave me you as my little sister. You are my very best friend. Even though things are changing and you are moving away in a couple of months, you will always hold that special place in my heart… a place that only a little sister can fill. As you venture off and do amazing things, don’t forget that you have three very proud big sisters & a big brother cheering you on. My baby Alex. Always.
I love you dearly, Allie.